Keep Your Dark Side From Running Your Life
太阳和黑暗云雾共存的心灵
“Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.”
沉缅于消极事物，只会增强消极的力量。
Every light has a darkness to balance it out.
有光明的地方，必定有黑暗以平衡。
People can be kind or mean or beautiful or ugly. We sometimes are compassionate or selfish, and at other times we feel safe or insecure, or confident or hopeless.
人们或善良或狡诈，或漂亮或丑陋。我们有爱心的一面，也有自私的一面。在不同的场合，我们或许对自己很有自信，很有安全感，但或许也会觉得绝望，充满不安感。
Every moment of every day we’re choosing which road to go down. If someone treats us unfairly, are we going to respond with hate and spite, or compassion and understanding?
每一天每一时刻，我们都在选择前进的方向。如果有人对我们不公，我们是不是要以厌恶和怨恨反击，还是以德报怨？
Society around us tries its best to help us choose. “Think about yourself first,” it says. “Aspire to be as beautiful and attractive as possible.” Subtle nods tell us it’s okay to use things and people to get what you want, to be aggressive, and to seek superficial adoration rather than deep friendships.
社会尽其所能帮助我们做选择。它说：“凡事先想好自己，立志尽量做到完美和吸引人。”社会向你微微点头以允许，你可以利用身边的事物和人脉得到你想要的，你可以争名夺利，你可以追求肤浅的崇拜，而放弃深厚的友谊。
Shove those negative feelings deep down like proverbial skeletons in the closet. Put those bad thoughts and desires in a box and don’t ever open it. But you can no more avoid dealing with your shadow than you can avoid using your left foot when you walk.
你可以把负面感情藏得严严实实的，就像那些不可告人的秘密一样。把不好的思想和渴望都藏起来不外露，永远不要触碰。但是，你不可能永远躲避着不去处理这些问题，就像你走路时，你不可能不迈出步子。
If you ignore your shadow, it will take on a life of its own. It will fester and eat away at you.
如果你忽视心中的阴霾，它将会永远的停留，并不断壮大，最后完完全全地把你吞噬。
Maybe you develop an alternate personality through which to express your shadow’s desires. Maybe you build walls of secrecy to hide the things you do when your shadow is in control. Either way, your being is off balance, and the impact on your life and your relationships can be devastating.
或许你会发展起另一种人格来表达你阴影里的欲望；又或许你会建立起一面秘密墙，来隐藏你负面情绪受控时的行为。但如果你这样做的话，生命的天秤就会失衡，这对你生活和人际关系的影响都是毁灭性的。
Here are some steps to get on the right track.
以下是让一切走回正轨的一些方法。
Commit to Exploring Your Dark Side
致力于探索自己的黑暗面
It’s a trip that’s not always going to be nice and pleasant. You will find out things didn’t know about yourself, and many of them won’t be positive. You have to commit to the search for truth to minimize the impact your shadow has on your life going forward.
这趟旅程并不是让人身心愉悦和一帆风顺的。你不能指望所有人都对你了如指掌，因此他们对你的评价也不可能全部是正面和积极的。你必须努力找出背后的真相，以减轻负面阴影对你人生的影响。
List Your Trigger Emotions
给触发你不良情绪的东西列个表
Come up with triggers for destructive behaviors, such as frustration, loneliness, hunger, low self-esteem, nervousness, and the like.
想一下能触发你做破坏性行为的事情，如挫败、寂寞、饥饿、自尊心低下、紧张等等。
If you have multiple different behaviors you’re trying to work on, you will probably find that many of the triggers drive more than one type of behavior. It’s not intended to be a smackdown; it’s designed to make you stronger and more prepared and able to handle future trigger events.
如果你有多个不同的负面行为，你将发现一个触发点能引发你多个破坏性行为。这并不是要你指责什么，它们的出现只是为了让你变得更加坚强，做更多的准备，并有能力应对未来更多能触发你不良情绪的事件。
Meditate
沉思冥想
A practice of seated meditation allows you a greater sense of neutral awareness of your feelings, emotions, and desires. To learn how to manage those thoughts, so that when a negative or destructive emotion comes along, you can choose to just send it along on its way.
静坐沉思可以让你对自己的感觉、情感和欲望有更中立的意识。学会如何控制这些想法，那么当负面的甚至对你有破坏性影响的情绪侵袭你时，你也可以从容选择和它各走各路，互不干扰。
Observe Your Shadow
研究你的阴暗面
So now we have established a list of trigger emotions that we need to be on the lookout for, and we’re learning to become more transparent to ourselves through meditation.
既然我们已经列了能触发情绪的列表，那么，我们接下来要做的，就是要对其进行好好地研究，并通过沉思，对我们的想法有更透彻的理解。
We’re now in a position to co-exist with our shadow.
我们心中的太阳和黑暗云雾处于一个共存的状态。
We don’t have to fight it, because it has no power over us. We know it’s there, we know what it looks like, and we know what to do when it shows its ugly face. “Only in the recognition and acceptance of our shadow side can we become whole, integrated, reconciled, and therefore truly and fully ourselves.”
我们并不需要与自己的阴暗面作斗争，因为它无法将我们打倒。我们知道它就在那里，知道它的真面目，我们也知道当阴暗面显露他丑陋一面的时候，我们也知道要怎么处理。只有承认和接受自己阴暗面的存在，我们才算是一个完整的个人，那才是最真实的我们。
You don’t fight it; you don’t suppress it; you don’t try to turn it into something it’s not. You recognize your shadow, but you don’t allow it to control your life or determine your future actions.
你不需要与其作斗争；不需要战胜它；也不需要转化它；你只需要承认它的存在，并不要让它控制你的生活，也不要让它影响你未来的行动。
